After much prayer, deliberation, stress, heartache, searching, scripture reading, Bible study, and more prayer, Jon and I have decided that God is leading us to take the call in Saint Louis. The decision was made undeniably clear in the last week, and for that we are very thankful. It was a very difficult decision for Jon to leave his first call and all of the kids after only one year. So I praise God for hitting us with some "holy two-by-fours" when we were having a hard time discerning his will for our lives.
So the house goes up on the market today. We stand to lose up to about $10,000 on the house, but we pray God will faithfully sustain us and provide for us as we seek to follow His will for our lives. It has been difficult, to say the least, to strategically pack things away as we prepare for our first showings. There always seems like there is more to do. I am just thankful to have learned the way of the FlyLadies to help the house stay clean without too much extras stress on a daily basis. The good news is that we will likely only have to be "show-ready" for two weeks as we intend to move by September 7th.
So how can we move if we haven't sold our house? By God's grace, our new church is merely 40 minutes away from my (Lani's) parents, so we will be storing our stuff (somehow not yet determined) and moving in with the Tindalls until the house is sold and we can buy another one in Saint Louis (south county, on Telegraph Rd, south of 255 for those of you familiar with Saint Louis). I must say that although we are glad to be near my family and are thankful for the extra help we will have when #2 gets here, we prayed that God would leave that out of our decision making. We had to put aside any of our selfish desires (which is a hard thing, trust me!), and really listen for God's will. We knew that even if it wasn't what we would have decided, that God has our best in mind, and that we would be much better off following God's will for our lives.
So please lift us up in prayer over these next few weeks. As the news breaks at church, we are mostly getting letters from angry youth who are convinced we are leaving because of something they did. It hurts so much to hear their anger, yet we know they need to vent, and we take the punches as we stand with our arms outstreched, still loving them all very much. They just physically can not understand all of the reasons that went into our decision, nor could we ever tell them. So gossip and rumors run rampant as people get angrier and angrier. Staying above the reproach when others are hitting you low is a hard road to follow. I pray that God will sustain us through our last days here. I pray for these youth that God would help their hearts heal and provide them another wonderful youth worker who will love them even more than we did. And it would seem that I have become the scapegoat for many in this congregation who are looking for someone to blame--the rumor is that I forced Jon to take this call since it was close to my family. If there's something we've learned over the years, it is that we, unfortunately, cannot change people's minds. So I pray that God would reveal the truth, protect our reputations (because we seek only to follow God's will and be a witness of His love), and bring about the healing that Cross View needs at this time. Sunday will be our announcement to the congregation (although most of them will already know through a letter that was sent out this week or through word of mouth). Please pray that we can make it through. I know it will be a challenging day. I think the hardest part is the silence.
Today, to combat the anger and the rumors, Jon sent out an email to the youth and their parents. I am so proud of him for this well-written (and no doubt Spirit-inspired) letter, so I want to share it with you:
Parents, Youth, and Youth Board-
As many of you have heard, and many have not, I accepted the call to serve at Faith Lutheran Church in Oakville , MO, this past week. As I am writing this message, the Cross View staff has sent out a letter concerning this matter and I ask that you read that letter and truly pray how you can help during this transition time.
From my end, I want to share with you that I did not take this call because I am displeased with the youth program or the “style” of worship at Cross View. It’s no secret that I am not a traditional person; however, I believe that worship can and does take place in many forms and fashions. I have loved and cherished my time with the youth and parents here at Cross View and, in all honesty, that was one of the hardest things to deal with in my deliberation of the call. I did not want to let go of the youth. I love you guys, I am blessed to have spent time with you, and I am truly honored to see how God has moved in and through you this past year.
When it comes down to it—God called, and I’m answering. I could throw excuse after excuse as to why I should stay here at Cross View, but through His Word, His Spirit, and other signs, God constantly brought me to the understanding that Faith is where He wants me to be. I knew when I came to that understanding, it would mean hurt feelings, sadness, shock, and even anger on some of your parts. I am truly sorry for that, and hope that God will touch your hearts and show you that He is with you in this time of turmoil.
As we go through this transition time together and as I depart from Cross View, you may be tempted to ask “why?” and search for evidence to support your theory. I encourage you to resist that temptation and to follow some words that have been close to my heart in all the moments where I have been tempted to ask the “Why God?” questions in my life. In a book titled Where is God When it Hurts? by Philip Yancey he discusses the temptation for people to ask “Why?” Why did my friend get hurt? Why did that plane crash in Spain ? Why did my grandpa die? Why can’t I be as good as my friend at soccer? Why is Pastor Jon leaving? He points to Luke 13 and Jesus’ response to the people asking Him why certain “bad” things happened. His concept is what I would like to pass onto you today in light of the current situation: The temptation is to ask the "Why?" question, but Jesus ignores the “Why?” and rather points to the “To what end?” It’s easy to ask “Why?” and speculate yourself into an untrue assumption. I encourage all of us to look beyond the “Why?” questions and follow Jesus’ example to ask, “Where do we go from here?” “What can we learn from this?” “What good can be made of this?” “How is God calling and encouraging me in this?”
Is this going to be easy? No! Is the devil going to tempt us all? Yes! But please please pray that through it all the Spirit would be on us, leading us to follow Him, helping us to resist the temptation to “Why?” ourselves away, and instead point us to the future and His calling to each of us through this situation.
My family and I have truly been blessed by all of you and our prayers continue and will continue to be with all of you.
At the Foot of the Cross
Pastor Jon
"I am clay in the hands of the potter." Is 64:8
Thank you for all of your prayers during our decision making process. Please keep us in your prayers as we make the move and start our new life and ministry in Saint Louis.
Our favorite place to visit! :)
Enjoying some chocolate milk...
Petting the soft sheep with Mommy
It's the granny from the Jay Leno show!
Evan loved watching the police dog demonstration from Daddy's shoulders
